A Glowing 2014

“To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other and to feel. That is the purpose of life” –The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

2014 leaves yet remains some how, like a great love I can never forget. This is the year I graduated, the year I started college. But those words seem empty, the accomplishments void of emotion, like describing a loved one as tall and brunette and brown eyed. There is so much more. This is the year I became bolder and my eyes brighter. It is the year I moved into the city of my snow globe and exploded my horizon. It is the year I found my transplant San Francisco family, the ones that makes the city as beautiful as it is. I regret leaving this year, as though I were moving out of a home that saw so many memories created. But in the end each home, each year, is but a structure made special by the people in its midst.

This night last year I had no idea what was in store for me. I didn’t know I could love, or be loved as much as I have been. I didn’t know how hopeful and tragic a goodbye could be until I waved goodbye to my friends and family. I didn’t know how glorious a hello could be until I first met the fellow students that would change my life. I’d never before felt the ache, not to praise myself, but to show my unadulterated love for the many special people in my life. My life is blessed by none of my own doing.

When my family gathered for Christmas, my cousin told me that I was glowing. I’ve had some time to contemplate this. I’d never been told this before. My happiness was always the quiet kind. Now it seems I cannot keep it in. I have stories worthy of telling. But I realize in the night sky of my life, I am not the shining star. I am the lucky wanderer, my face illuminated by the brilliant glow of the stars, the people around me. The memory of them ignites every story I have. They beam and burst and brighten my big eyes. Their light marks the skylines of the two cities I move between. I glow because of their presence.

Everything and everyone I love is fastened in the snow globe of my heart. It shakes with the buzz of cable cars and the passionate red beat of bridges. It echoes with the steady fast call back home, to mountains and memories. 2014 is etched in the San Francisco sand, faded by the tide but remembered by the feel of footprints. Here no earthquake will shake my resolution to love my friends, my angels, the characters of my life for as long as I can. 

“To see the world.” In 2014 I lived intertwined in the intimacies and intricacies of San Francisco. But I learned that the hearts of others make the most beautiful destinations.

“Things dangerous to come to.” I moved alone to a huge city, making the biggest decision of my life. The first step is the hardest. But I’ve learned it only takes one big decision to change everything.  It only takes one decision to glow.

 “To see behind walls.” This year was more than a structure, more than walls—it was defined by the people that filled them, and the ways we ventured outside of them. I’ve learned it doesn’t matter which city I’m in, there’s a story out there and a person worth living it with.

“To draw closer.” I’ve drawn closer to myself and my dream. I scream my happiness aloud, and it is a miracle to have stumbled upon the right path, every step in the right direction, lighted by my stars.

“To find each other and to feel.” Somehow I have found others. My friends and family are lighthouses that beacon to me as I travel across the sea. My newfound friends are ships that will sail with me to the end of the world. I cannot thank them enough. No night of my life is dark.

“That is the purpose of life.”